What results to expect from cold approach pick up

Disclaimer: This is based on my life experiences being cold approaching for more than 20 years. As always, you should do your own critical thinking and formulate your own conclusions. To get value of a post please please follow and read the links so it could be more valuable and understandable to you.

Before this post please read “introduction to cold approach pick up” since this is a follow up post. Here is a question by a seducer that goes by name travel and museums:

I’ve been doing cold approach, online, club, social game for 6 months. I think cold approach is by far the most challenging. It DOES work but has a low rate of return. Especially for SNL. So someone with tight social game is going to dismiss it. 

Social game is on the opposite end of the PU spectrum. You’re prequalified for goodness sake. Way easier. Basically ur just trying to not fuck it up or choose the wrong chick. Only real problem can be building from social to seductive vibe (less of a problem in music loving crowd I’d think). 

Cold approach:
-Hard to get in state. 
-Have to handle frequent rejection/interruptions. 
-Competing theories. 
-Girl not in state/busy. 
-Tiring
-the most work of any game

this being said, as someone else pointed out, if your traveling you have to cold approach bc social circle is nonexistent. So it’s a good skill to have and not get too rusty. Just don’t beat yourself up over using it. Cold Apprpach is never going to return you a crazy amount of pussy. It’s like a batting average. At its best it’s purely about numbers and getting on base. Swing away. 

Maybe u should think of getting a girls attention first and AI. Those are the pitches. Otherwise ur swinging at a nonexistent pitch. Work on getting a pitch so u actually have something to hit! 

Also consider your own motivations. For instance Ive come to the conclusion that cold approach (for me) isn’t worth it unless I’m spending a couple months in one place. It already goes against my nature to try so hard + I usually have poor logistics. Im so poorly motivated from cold approach unless a girl is obviously DTF I wouldn’t text her anyway. That being said I know I need to keep working at it so it will be second nature when/if I need it.

I am going to start by saying that I know a lot of guys in the community that are really popular and have tons of credibility advocate social circle and online etc… ( I will cover this as you go alone and those guys are the exception in their successes and not the norm.)

First, if you look at your life in general, you got started with social circle game… If you ever went to high school (that is social circle), if you went to church (youth group) that is social circle, if you did any martial arts (social circle), if you work in any job (social circle) and on and on and on…

Most guys got started with social circle, social programming and the media tell you that is the norm… That is how everyone got started. However, if you look back at your life, you will realize that you were never good at social circle and even if you were awesome! you probably got a gf or 2 out of it. (again anormalities like the seducers tubs, 0, faust etc.. But bare with me, nevermind this guys did cold approach for a while, is my speculation).

Social circle is extremely unneficient , but i will agree that is the best for the top tier women, with that being said as a seducer by the name tarzan says, those top tier women will go to the top tier guy in the social circle. In my high school for example out of 100 guys there were probably 3-5 guys at the top… And unfortunately they got 1 or 2 girlfriends through the 4 years of high school, again very un efficient game…

With that being said my capoeira teacher(is the best natural i have known doing social circle) since he is in a position of authority, but tons of drama till no end.

A good show in reality tv that shows cool player doing social circle with top tier women is “Vanderpump rules” it is on Bravo I encourage you to see the show to take a look at how social circle game is.

Me debunking my opinion against social circle is in this post.

Online has gotten bad in the last 5 years and the problem with online is that it kills the “cold approach” aspect of live pick up. I met a girl that was on a date from a dude online in a club, that girl was one of the most annoying girls I have ever met in my life, totally socially uncalibrated. Also, in cities with a good night life, online women tend to be lower quality vs. other games. Think about it why would a really high quality girl would be online? With that being said seducers like the rev., bd, kant, dude, cobi do extremely well in this.

Now that i took a shot as social circle and online lets go back to cold approach and what to expect from it, how does it work and how does success look like:

First, at the beginning I would say for 6 months to 2 years, it will be extremely hard for SOME and very inconsistent.

The main problem will be Approach Anxiety.- There are hundreds of theories and mental masturbation on approach anxiety. So I will give you my opinion with is to get it handle and not eliminate it (I do not think you can fully get rid of it) and that is with progressive desensitization… (good looking loser has some drills on it).

I also recommend getting started with day game or street night game AND NOT CLUB INSIDE/CLUB NIGHT GAME, unless you go the dance floor game route.

I also recommend you go for numbers and make outs instead of going for pipi in vagina for start. You did not start running, you started crawling, then semi walking, then walking, then running right??

Now that is the most difficult part of cold approach(approach anxiety), after you get enough experience with cold approach, unless you are a sociopath, nutcase, hard case, weirdo, aspie, hyging or you look below average. You will start understanding dynamics, social cues, approach invites, body language, and you will get a sense of calibration. This stuff will make you life very easy I talk about this here.

This is the second question by the seducer that goes by travel and museums:

o so what is everyone’s rate of return on cold approaching women in non social environments. From meet to lay? Just curious. Bc I don’t think it’s ever more than like 20% and even less for SNL. Also requires mostly day 2s etc. 

I responded to this thread bc I have similar sarcastic feelings: Can I get better at random cold approach by numbers? Yeah. Is it worth it to me? Not really. My time is too valuable. Rather focus on other areas of game or at least only gaming girls I have a viable shot at SNL with. 

Maybe I’m just burned out. Dunno. I suppose a lot of cold approach is building a ridiculously strong reflex that overrules all the negative outcomes.

Now what does the progression look like:

1.- At the beginning you will spam approach to get rid of approach anxiety. ( a normal dude should handle this in a month)

2.-then you will continue cold approach but a bit more selective due to identifying body language trends based on experience.

3.- you should start sleeping with girls from 5-8.

4.- you will get your first 8-10 interaction and indication of interest and maybe develop Onitis (obsession with that one girl).

5.- You will get more 8-10 and handle better the onitis, some here will go long term relationship.

6.- you will get your heart broken and brake some hearts.

7.- now you will have a better sense of women and dynamics.

8.- After sleeping with a lot of women and all types of women, you will develop a type of girl you are more drawn too.

9.- You will start becoming like a girl.(in the thought process)

10.- just like women you will develop more appreciation beyond looks for sexual compatibility and personality.

So how does success look like:

This is a million dollar question, success is relative and personalized and may change based on age and life stage…

For example some guys come into learn success with women to get a girlfriend out of it. (am I necessarily happier than them cause I sleep with more women, who knows?)

Some other guys can get tons of Onenight stands or single night lays… But, those same guys are sometimes not happy cause they can not hold on to a girl, so are they happier than a dude with long term girlfriend??? See were i am getting at?

Some other guys go through periods of pair bonding, fuckatons, back to pair bonding.

Some guys like to have long term poly relationships and complex set ups dating multiple girls at the same time. (and their own definition of what is happiness)

Some guys want a main girlfriend that are into 3 somes, to pick up other girls.

Some guys are happy having a long term girlfriend and going out, and getting laid if i feel like getting laid and not calling a girl back for 3 months etc..

Some guys like having multiple pair bonding experiences (serial monogaminst).

some guys like the traditional marriage and kids.

Some like to be married and poly.

Some live in with the wife and have a lover in another place that the wife knows about and is ok with.

In the above example who is to say one dude with a particular goal is happier than another dude.

In my opinion success from cold approach pick up should be close to this:

Most guys lay the 6-8 occasional 9 and rare 10. (no matter what type is their 10). Again most guys will make the 9-10 a girlfriend, or main girl… And/or most guys will pair bond even if the girl is not 9 or 10 and make her the girlfriend/main. The longer and the better you are the more picky you will also get selecting women, so your quality should go up on who are you gonna let in your life, your tolerance for bad behavior should go down.

If you go out 3 nights a week a good player should get laid 1 of those 3 nights. So maybe once a week. (this eventually will not be your focus, since you will be pickier and you will not care as bad to get laid).

A normal player with get laid once of 6 nights.(going out 3 times a week)

A beginner player once a month or so. If it takes longer there is a problem with looks, aspines etc…(going out 3 times a week)

Some guys will go longer periods of not getting laid cause they want the 9s and 10s so will sacrifice some quality for quantity. (I really do not recommend this). I will include some gurus as well, i know mystery only goes for 10s for example.(who knows though). Sometimes, is an excuse for not being good, “I only good for 10s etc..” aka cope out.

Now a single nigh lay is about finding a girl that is sexually available, and having the right logistics. The community over inflates snl/ons some for marketing and some of it is perception, a guy goes out 3 months then writes a report were he had a single night lay or a dude did 1,000 approaches got a one night stand with a tourist in Las Vegas. Get me? fucking a girl on the second or 3rd encounter, does not matter the goal is pipi in vagina or whatever your goal is as long as you do not come across as a provider.

I do recommend people get couple of one night stands for experience, it is not big deal, it actually sucks lol…(if people are honest most times they suck).

Hope it helps give you an idea on what to realistically expect from cold approach pick up. Out!